March 2012
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Dating Tips #229: If you've got it, flaunt it
When going on a first date, play up your best physical feature. Not in a slutty or overdone way, but just find an outfit that highlights it. If it’s your smile, put on brighter lipstick than you’d normally wear. If it’s your eyes, play it up with eyeshadow. When you play up a part of yourself that you like, you’ll go into the date with more confidence. And confidence is...
February 2012
52 posts
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Challenge for Sardonic Dating Advice followers!
Hey guys, Sardonic Dating Advice very close to reaching 500 followers, which is about 450 more than I ever dreamed I’d have. What I’m challenging you to do is get at least 1 person to follow us. If this happens, SDA could double the number of followers in no time! So, start reblogging, tweeting and promoting us! Send me a message with how many people you got to follow SDA and I might...
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HowAboutWe: 10 Secret Perks of Going Through a... →
5. You are more likely than EVER to meet another boy. People dig their cute single friends out of the woodwork to set you up. Plus you give off that I Am Newly Single Vibe, which is scientifically proven to attract a guy. If I could capture that pheromone and put it in a perfume bottle, I am convinced I would be the richest person alive.
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Dating Tips #228: Don't over-think it
Whether you’re flirting or just having a conversation, don’t over-think every little detail. The person you’re interested in probably doesn’t notice your slight stutter or the fact that you keep nervous giggling. Just breathe and be yourself, because that’s the best you can be. The only way you can be yourself is to stop thinking about trying to act natural and just...
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The Atlantic: All The Single Ladies by Kate Bolick →
This is a brilliant (albeit, long) article by Kate Bolick on how women are staying single longer and reasons behind it. It’s a must read.
Anonymous asked: Dear Alli, I've been talking to a guy for about a month on and off, and Thursday he told me he liked me. We skyped for 5 hours that day, and I haven't really heard from him since. Do you think he's still interested?
Anonymous asked: is there some kind of way to find someone who doesn't totally suck? I find myself falling for really nice guys but when we get down to DTR I am perceived as "not attractive enough" or "not intelligent enough" to date, but as friends we are great. It's nice to have friends but uhhhhhh I'm not a fan of being alone forever.
Anonymous asked: What are some things you should avoid when thinking about dating a person?
Anonymous asked: A guy that I am very much enamored with has recently told me his housemates want to meet me. I am more than willing, but I still don't know for sure if he "likes me". Am I taking this too far to think that if his friends (that I don't know) want to meet me he must be telling them about me, and assume he does like me if he talks about me to his friends?
Anonymous asked: My boyfriend suggested we live together when my lease is up in August. He suggested this about two months ago and we've both mentioned it in positive ways. When he first mentioned it, I said I was apprehensive because I didn't want it to screw things up. I've lived with a partner before and he hasn't. Today I mentioned it and he said he wasn't sure about it now because he...
Anonymous asked: I have a crush on my daily barista. He is really cute but I don't know if I should say something or if that would be a bad idea. Help?
Anonymous asked: So I met this guy a couple of months ago and I've only just begun to get really involved in the same club that he's in. Whenever I see him we always exchange pleasantries and small talk. I was always attracted to him from the moment I met him, but now I know it's become a hardcore crush. I don't think he knows that I'm into him. He's really old school- doesn't...
Anonymous asked: Dear Alli, I recently have become "interested" in a girl I saw online. After a long battle with myself, I finally mustered up enough courage to at least say something to the effect of hello. I got a message saying hello back. Win! I tried starting a convo, but all I got were one word answers. I know she's single and looking and she seems cool as hell, but I don't know if her...
Anonymous asked: I was just wondering what age you think guys expect that when your dating you're going to have sex? I'm 15 and just started dating this guy but I don't feel emotionally or physically ready to have sex. I was just wondering if it's expected that we'll have sex or if dating can still be without it. Also, do you think I should bring it up so that we're on the same page...
Anonymous asked: How do you not fall hard for someone? it seems like all girls no mater what age do.
Anonymous asked: I've gotten over a guy that I used to like. Now I'm sort of just stuck in this hole of self-pity where I think about the guys I could've gone out with while I had a crush on that one guy. Looking back on it though, I guess I wouldn't have my heart in it, which means staying single was probably best for me that time. But I just can't shake this horrible feeling of...
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HowAboutWe:The 5-Step Breakup Recover Plan →
2. Set a Deadline. Breakups are hard. Things didn’t turn out the way you expected and its okay to be sad/ angry / upset. Give yourself a couple of days or a week to feel the pain. Eat ice cream, have a good cry, stay in bed watching The Wonder Years in its entirety. But once you hit that deadline, time to get in gear.
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HowAboutWe: 8 Ways to Ace the First Five Seconds... →
If you get rejected, be graceful and move on. No one likes rejection and it stings, but if it happens and you get completely snubbed, don’t shout, “BITCH!” and run from the party crying. Just move on. Not everyone is going to be as fabulous as you are. It’s their loss. Relax, keep smiling, give it a minute, and try again
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Dating Tips #227: Be with someone who values you
The person you’re dating should value who you are and what you bring to the relationship and vice versa. Don’t take advantage of what you have and stop searching for something better. If you don’t value who you’re with, then let them go so they can find someone who does value them.
Questions/Response
Email: sardonicdatingadvice@gmail.com
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Dating Tips #226: Are you looking for the right...
When you’re dating, make sure you know the difference between wanting the right person for you and wanting the person that’s here right now. If you’re looking for the latter, then don’t lead someone on if you’re just wanting them for the moment.
Questions/Response
Email: sardonicdatingadvice@gmail.com
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Chiara Says: The Irish Goodbye in Dating -... →
My one buddy made my point for me, ‘I think a lot of times people don’t want to hurt feelings.Which is ignorant because being ignored and not having a reason for something is a much worse/ more lingering type of hurt.’
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Dating Tips #225: Always say "Yes" to one date
Even if someone who isn’t “your type” asks you on a date, say yes. One date won’t kill you and you might be surprised to find you could like someone unexpected. If you’re still not feeling it after the first date, then don’t agree to any more. One date doesn’t mean you owe them anything, so go out, have fun and meet new people.
Questions/Response
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HowAboutWe: 15 Perks to Being Single and Dating →
8. Better Brunch Stories Your crazy, roller coaster dating stories make you the most popular person at brunch. Your dating and hook-up stories may not end in “happily ever after,” but they’re always entertaining.
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Dating Tips #224: Don't give in to things that...
The “mourning” period after a breakup is painful. You want to look at the other person’s Facebook, you want to talk to them, you don’t want to accept the fact that this relationship is over. But once you move past this period, it’s still detrimental to yourself if you check their Facebook, Twitter or whatever else they have. Giving in to the temptation to see how...
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Dating Tips #223: Start your life
Don’t wait to be in a relationship to start your life. Go for what you want now and save the serious stuff for later. Your life doesn’t start when you meet “the one” or just “someone.” It starts when you decide to go for your dreams, no matter who or what is in the way.
Questions/Response
Email: sardonicdatingadvice@gmail.com
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Dating Tips #222: Don't worry about someone...
They’ll probably be broken up by St. Patrick’s Day, Easter at the latest.
Questions/Response
Email: sardonicdatingadvice@gmail.com
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Dating Tips #221: Beware of "It's just moving too...
These are lines used by people who don’t have the balls to tell you the truth. They won’t tell you that they don’t have feelings for you or that they’ve met someone else. This is an insult to intelligence because we know that this just means you’re not into us. Tell the truth and be honest about your feelings. It might hurt at first, but it’s better than telling...
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The Dating Specialist: The Only Way Women Will... →
A woman can’t build trust with a dishonest man. Nothing will turn her off quicker than a guy pretending to be someone he’s not. And while you may not be “lying” per se, isn’t hiding your emotions and intentions equally as bad?
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HowAboutWe: Why You Should Celebrate San Faustino... →
What’s San Faustino Day, you say? Glad you asked. San Faustino Day falls on February 15, the day after Valentine’s Day, and is a day dedicated to… single people!
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Dating Tips #220: Never be on the hook for anyone
If someone tells you they want to be with you, but won’t, then you’re probably just keeping you on the hook until someone better comes along. You deserve better, so stop playing their game and go find someone who wants you. Right now.
Questions/Response
Email: sardonicdatingadvice@gmail.com
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Dating Tips #219: Sometimes the only way to go is...
There’s no use looking back at what happened. It’s over, it’s done and it’s time to move forward. Things were said that can’t be taken back and relationships that you wanted to last have ended. We can’t fix these things, but we can learn from them and move forward with our lives.
Questions/Response
Email: sardonicdatingadvice@gmail.com
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Just a little respect.
A while back, I wrote an article for Reasons to be Beautiful about what I believe is the most important aspect of a relationship. Now I realize that barely in 2nd place to trust is respect.
Respect is important when it comes to relationships because if someone isn’t being respected, then they shouldn’t be in the relationship.
I’ve been in situations where the other person...
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Dating Tips #218: Next!
When someone isn’t treating you how you deserve or they break it off with you, just think, “Next!” because you don’t have time to waste on people who don’t want you or don’t treat you right.
Questions/Response
Email: sardonicdatingadvice@gmail.com
Anonymous asked: I feel like since she is moving away this year that it won't work out and that I would have ruined friendship on my hands, and I really don't want that. What should I do?
Anonymous asked: How do i move on and make my heart stop hurting?
Anonymous asked: How can you tell if a guy is really interested in you? i can never really figure this out :/
Anonymous asked: Okay so i wanted to ask every time i talked to a guy weather it's in person or Facebook chat sometimes i feel like i run out of things to say to them or i just get nervous talk more then i should depends on the guy! How can I make a conversation last longer with a guy especially if it's one I like? I'm always saying hey how are you or hey what's up, but i feel like when tell a...
Anonymous asked: I have a crush on my guy friend that I've known off and on for 6 years. The like is mutual. The only problem is, he's technically in a relationship. He's not happy in it but he's taken on the fatherly role of her baby since the father is MIA (though she left my friend to date said guy/got pregnant/he took her back). And she has some expensive items of his on her car but she...
Anonymous asked: i really like all the advice you give to everyone including me :)) i have also been reading lots of dating advice books which have help me a lot :) I was wondering what major would this fall into? i was thinking to make it out as a career to help people with dating or marriage issues what would that fall into the category of psychology?
Anonymous asked: We're friends but dont talk too often. I've texted him 3 times this past month, convo's went well. Always ends with him saying "Take care<3" He's always really busy with hockey but I want to talk to him a little more, but I dont want to be that annoying girl who always texts him. should I? or should I just forget about him? I just want to keep in touch but not be...
Anonymous asked: i've been dating this guy for 3 months and i went to a party last night and got pretty drunk. I hooked up with a guy from my school and i've been mentally and physically beating myself up. the thing is, if i don't tell him he will never find out. is it better to keep it from him so he doesn't get hurt or should i tell him?
Anonymous asked: How do i become more confident and conformable around guys or talking to them? it seems like every time i talk to them even in person or online i still get nervous sometimes i miss out my chance to say hey what's up or something like that? i have no idea why i get so nervous when it comes to guys but i do.
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HowAboutWe: Single on V-Day? 5 Things You Might... →
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The Urban Dater: Benefits of Dating an Asshole →
The asshole is often the unsung hero in a relationship. There’s also a degree of asshole, mind you. There’s the assholes that kick ass, take names and tell you what’s on their mind; they just don’t give a shit. Then there’s the other kind of asshole: The type that sleep with your friends, throw puppies into the sun, piss all over the place, err toward abusive behavior and are horrible...
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Questions
Hey guys,
Sorry it’s taking me so long to answer questions (both here and over email). I’m swamped with school and work but I will try to respond to them tomorrow. After that, I will be having “Sardonic Sundays” where I take time on Sundays to answer the questions for the week.
Questions/Response
Email: sardonicdatingadvice@gmail.com
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Dating Tips #217: Go big or go home
In dating, as in life, you shouldn’t do something half-assed. Give it your all and say that you tried.
Questions/Response
Email: sardonicdatingadvice@gmail.com
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Dating Tips #216: Change is good.
Life is full of changes. This means that your relationships will change. Some will end and some will begin. Don’t get stuck on the ones ending because it’s just opening yourself up for something better in the future. Change is good and we need to embrace it with open arms.
Questions/Response
Email: sardonicdatingadvice@gmail.com
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The Daily Love: Are You Tired of Feeling Lonely? →
It is a vulnerable thing to reach out and connect. Being in a human body, life and relationships are sometimes messy. If you don’t want to get messy. Stay up in heaven. Reaching out and connecting with others is risk. But the rewards are so much greater.